In this hour, we discussed Estonian door-to-door sales shmucks, our manly things of the weeks, and we took a call from The Uberbastard, Chris, in response to my dilemma of etiquette.
the way. Anyone know how long it takes to get to Miami?
I have been trying to determine if a man, man, man gets married, lately. Mickey is currently single, and enjoying the bachelor life. He sleeps where, when, and with whom he pleases, eats when he is hungry, has a stellar couch and TV, and so forth. These trappings are all man, man, man.
I, however, spend many a day talking to the baby, helping to pick out some cute bowls at Target, and discussing nutrition.
J spends his entire life picking up and returning things to Pier One, Sticks and Stuff, Thom McAnn, Claire’s, Kohl’s, Macy’s, etc.
It would seem marriage is a giant emasculation sham, and shifts men from “Self-Absorbed Hunter” to “Gopher and Cuticle-Trimmer”. Maybe this is why married guys convert their garages to “purposed” rooms.
Tonight I want to go see the Perseid Meteor Shower. It is certainly a thing I would have done when I was single, no questions asked. But now I need to weigh it against,
“Do I want my kid out in all those mosquitos”"
“Should I be asking my wife to sit up with me all night when I usually have to throw water on her to get her to stay awake through 10:00PM?”
“Will I get enough sleep to be functional at work tomorrow, so I can continue to pay the mortgage?”
“Have I got baby-safe mosquito repellant?”
“What about the dogs? All three in the car seems like a pain”
“Where is a safe place to park, off someone’s land, away from all light sources, yet not in a swamp, yet with a clear view?”
“Better make sure the phones are charged in case there is an emergency”
“Should I take the pack-and-play?”
“What if everyone gets hungry? I should make up some food, but I need a cooler, and ice.”
“Should I bring a sweater for Jen in case she gets cold”
“Do we have folding chairs anymore? Where the hell are those things?”
“Have I got all the baby wipes, diapers, gripe water, orajel, balmx, aveeno skin cream, tissues, toys, and sippy cups?”
“Have I got a back brace, in case Jen gets randy?”
Oh. It’s already 5:00 AM… guess I missed the show.
I probably should not screw up my family’s sleep cycle just to go watch rocks fall out of the sky. But I am. Weird.
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