There's no easy way of saying this, so curl up beside me and let me find my voice.
As always, this was completely unscripted. This is my first 'coming out' video to to my friends and family, though I had discussed the issue with people in larger circles. I filmed
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it because I wanted to see how much of a dork I actually was, and also because I have a way of blanking out my memory in stressful situations. I never imagined that I would one day post something so personal and awkward to the internet.
Eight months later I was in the middle of writing the coming out letter to my family. I had told a few close friends back in Southern Ontario before I left, and everyone I knew in Winnipeg knew that I am gay. But I had kept the secret from most people I know in Southern Ontario because I wasn't ready to tell my family yet. The risk of them finding out before I was ready grew exponentially with each person who knew.
However, the longer I was out, the more comfortable I became with my sexuality and situation. I came across the video on my hard drive about a month ago by accident, having forgotten that I had even filmed it (see above re: blackout). It suddenly dawned on me that there aren't very many videos such as this available to the public. I knew this, because I had done extensive research across the blogosphere searching for inspiration and the wisdom of those who had been 'there' before me. I thought that this might be my gift to the cause. It also saved me having to tell hundreds of people in person.
My hope is that some other closeted individual might come across this video and see that it can be done, you can tell someone you love I'm Gay, and life will continue.
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