Name 5 Things Videos

Warren begins this episode with a particularly challenging edition of "Name 5 Things", asking us to name 5 statements matching the formula "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." First a negative, then a reflexive affirmative. Sounds tough! Until John points out that there's no criterion asserting that the statement makes sense. Brace yourself for some surprising insights on the interrelationships between cheese and mice, some fairly careless agreement between subject and verb, some very crunchy toast, and a few statements that are highly unlikely to become popular. If you can think of any statements that are better than ours (it shouldn't be difficult), please let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings. URL: http://www.limitedappeal.net

Does a word rhyme with itself? If you think you know the answer, ask yourself about the simple math. You heard me! This is actually a complicated issue. We're talking at least 13 different definitions, here. Remember Emily Dickinson, bitch? I know, it's weak sauce, but there's a chance Warren is technically right about something, for once. Astonished? I thought you might be. Anyway, to avoid dwelling on Warren's possible correctness, we "quickly" change the subject to a "Name 5 Things" segment, in which we attempt the reverse of our last "Name 5..." porn edition: Warren will name a porno title, and we have to derive the mainstream film that is analogous to it. It turns out this is a really tough exercise (in case you hadn't guessed from our episode title). Play the game along with us, and prove your superior reverse Porn Name 5 Things skills by sending us you answers by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings. URL: http://www.limitedappeal.net

What's the appeal of crystal meth? Is it really worth taking, just so you can experience our podcast in 3D? Probably not, for at least two reasons. Stick with the alcoholism, OK? Our Name 5 Things segment this week takes a pornographic turn when Warren asks us to derive the adult movie parody titles for several recent Hollywood films. You might think that those few minutes spent thinking of bad puns have limited appeal. Good call! But it's still fun to learn about our favourite porn genres. Spoiler alert: T-Bone knows a lot about this topic. If you wish to use any of our titles for your pornographic film (whether or not you think it will appeal to small penis fetishists), email us to discuss a suitable royalty arrangement (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings. URL: www.limitedappeal.net

We begin this special holiday episode by trying to name five things to carve at Halloween other than pumpkins. (It's not very nice to the pumpkins, after all.) You can play along, but remember where to stick your candle. And all wooden things count together. Why can't pumpkin insides be a mash of non-stringy mush? It's just confusing. If you can help clear up the confusion, let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Then in Urban Legend, Warren tells us about the increased risk of zombification that arises when people are regularly hypnotized. Do you or your friends show any symptoms? Listen and we will reveal the two things that will certainly decrease your risk of turning into a zombie, presuming that's a bad thing. Voila! Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

In case you were expecting us to tell you when you're meant to laugh while listening to this, you're in luck! Given that our podcast has limited appeal, we thought we would help you out by providing a laugh track on this one episode. In the first controversial segment, we try to name five sitcoms that the world would be better off without. See if you agree with our choices. Then in Good Idea/Bad Idea, we discuss whether laugh tracks are a good idea or a bad idea. We put some extra effort into making sure you're focussed on our show, by giving you lots of laugh track pauses. But I think we've found the right balance so the laugh track is barely noticeable, and certainly not annoying. If we're wrong, once you stop laughing you can email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net) to tell us we suck. Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

We begin by trying to name five things: lands, but we end up asking many more questions than we can answer in this episode. Can you help us? Is Greenland a country? Is Luseland a land? Can you name 5 Reichs? What is your dependency status? Is Scotland a country or just a nation? Does Greenland have its own soccer team? Who plays for the Vatican's side? Have you ever eaten while crapping? (You should have been expecting a poo question in here somewhere.) Is the problem swallowing or chewing? Continuously or continually? Are you sick of these questions? Why? Would you like to email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net)? Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.