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PNS337 show notes by Queen Elizabeth IIWhat? I can’t hear you. Those handsy Obamas gave me an iPod and it has changed my life. I’ll never have to sit through “God Save the Queen” ever again. I was opening a hospital this morning and listening to PNS the whole time. Delicious. Rob’s back! Which stage of grieving is Hilary Duff’s career at? She’s 22, so rehab is gonna be right around the corner. Patrick and Noah had a bad-movie night watching two shitpiles: the talent-free “The Room” (you can watch a clip on Boomtacular) and yet another Ashley-Judd-gettin’-roofied-’n’-raped crapstorm, “Twisted.” The Daytime Emmys are coming up. Who will be nominated? Marnie Schulenberger or Meredith Hagner? Crystal Chappell or Marcy Rylan? I’m so excited I could wet my — oops, too late. Actually, I don’t have a clue who any of these people on daytime are, but someone sure does: Rob “I’ve Got Time On My Hands During The Day” Lindley. Mouth-breather Star Jones (born “Starlet” – no kidding) tried to be an inspirational weight-loss guru on “Oprah.” Nuh-uh, girlfriend. That’s selling ice to eskimos. Those “Whatever, Martha” girls are wretched and need a snarky fag to make it work. What are those Queer Eye faggotz doing these days? “Rescue Me” is a fire station packed to the balls with hot guys. How hot? Pat would let any one of them go the full-face shart in two-seconds flat, so you know they’ve gotta be five-alarm. Also hot: Bonnie Hunt’s warm-up guy. The warm-up crew on “Oprah” are just nazis, and Oprah herself is pushing for the 2016 Chicago Olympics. Getting a drink at Sidetrack will become a gold-medal event. Listeners who want to be on the show: email with your Skype name. Who’s dropping off the perch first: Farrah Fawcett or Patrick Swayze? More calls to 206-888-GAYZ, please! Keep ’em short and snappy, OK? If you need counseling or have a voice that sounds like the dial tone, you’re totally calling the wrong number. Pat’s off to New York to take in some Broadway shows. “9 to Gyne: The Musical” just opened, the perfect excuse to round out this shit sammie with a shrillcast of that song. BTW, Dolly: if you have any more plastic surgery, your gunt’s gonna be up where your boobs are and your boobs will be behind your ears. Stop it! I liked this show so much that I’m subscribing in the iTunes. Look at me - I’m a web-savvy silver surfer. L8R, subjects. PNS337

He draws lotsa cartoons.

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SelectPlusJumbo Jet Lands With Gaping Hole in SideJumbo Jet Lands With Gaping Hole in SideThe Associated PressA Qantas Boeing 747 jumbo jet makes a quick descent and lands in the Philippines after a hole appears in the lower fuselage. Passengers put on oxygen masks after the explosive decompression that is now under investigation. (July 25)[Notes:ANCHOR VOICE] [Notes:VO video from on board plane, masks hanging down]AN EMERGENCY ON BOARD QANTAS FLIGHT 30 ... CRUISING AT 29,000 FEET ABOVE THE SOUTH CHINA SEA.THIS VIDEO SHOT BY A PASSENGER SHOWS OXYGEN MASKS DANGLING ... THE PLANE LOSING ALTITUDE AFTER SUFFERING AN EXPLOSIVE DECOMPRESSION. [Notes:VO video inside plane landing] THE PLANE MADE AN EMERGENCY LANDING IN MANILA ... TO PASSENGER APPLAUSE. [Notes:NATS of clapping]ONCE ON THE GROUND, THE DAMAGE BECOMES OBVIOUS ... A HOLE THE SIZE OF A SMALL CAR ON THE UNDERSIDE OF THE BOEING 7-47 JUMBO JET.WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENED IS STILL NOT CLEAR ... AN OFFICIAL WITH THE TRANSPORTATION SECURITY ADMINISTRATION SAYS IT APPEARS THE INCIDENT IS NOT TIED TO TERRORISM. [Notes:VO shot through cabin of crew embracing]THE PLANE WAS CARRYING 346 PASSENGERS. NO ONE WAS INJURED. JUST SHAKEN.SOT: There was an almighty crack and you could hear something happening. And then the oxygen masks fell down and you started dropping down, the ears popping, and that sort of stuff. SOT: Still a bit shaky, but happy to survive. THE FLIGHT WAS ON ITS WAY TO MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA, AFTER A STOPOVER IN HONG KONG. A SAFETY EXPERT SAID THE HOLE CAUSED THE PLANE TO LOSE PRESSURE AND OXYGEN ... REQUIRING THE PILOT TO MAKE A QUICK DESCENT TO NORMALIZE OXYGEN LEVELS.QANTAS IS AUSTRALIA'S LARGEST AIRLINE AND BOASTS A STRONG SAFETY RECORD ... HAVING NEVER LOST A PLANE TO AN ACCIDENT. ___ ___, The Associated Press.(****END****) ANCHOR VOICE:-------------------------VIDEO PRODUCER: Lee Powell------------------------------VIDEO SOURCE: AMATEUR VIDEO/ABS CBN--------------------------VIDEO APPROVAL:------------------------------VIDEO RESTRICTIONS: No Access Australia, Philippines----------------------------------SCRIPT/WIRE SOURCE: Philippines-Emergency Landing, 8th------------------------------------ Author: AssociatedPress Keywords: emergency landing jumbo jet lands gaping hole Added: July 26, 2008

Annie medley. Great to use for your next enhanced interogation. xox PNS264